A divorce is never an easy process for kids, regardless of their age. It is even worse when the parents are on bad terms. Kids become confused and may even slip into depression. There are a few things you can do to help your child during this crucial period.
Maintain routines
While it may be difficult to navigate going through a divorce and caring for kids, you need to try as much as possible to maintain the routines the child is used to. If you’re not able to because of lack of funds, contact a Fort Worth Child Support Legal Specialist to help you with ensuring that your ex spouse pays for childcare.
If you have shared custody, it may be difficult to maintain the same routines. At this point you can draw up a schedule with your ex spouse for the good of the child. If the situation is too volatile, then you can involve a mediator to help you draw up the plan. If mediation also fails, the parent can apply to court to get a child arrangement order.
Go on your shopping trips and pick out the prettiest dresses or cutest shoes. This could also be an opportunity to bond and help them to heal.
Talk to them
It can be difficult to explain things to kids after a divorce. Some may hate you for ruining their happy family life. Others may struggle with understanding how things went wrong and now one parent was no longer a few steps away.
It is important to be honest to the child because they understand more than you know. Despite the issues you have with your ex spouse, they remain a part of the child’s life, so it doesn’t help to disparage them in the presence of the kids.
Give them time
Younger kids may adjust to the change faster than teenagers. It is worse when the child has a good relationship with the other parent. Such kids can shut out the parents they live with because they think it’s their fault. They may even want to live with the other parent.
When this happens, don’t antagonize the child. Allow them to express themselves and try to explain the situation calmly. If possible, arrange for a visit to the other parent to make them happy.
Stay in contact
Being separated from a parent is heart wrenching for kids. If you do not have full custody of the child, try to stay in contact. This is when your child needs you even more. Call them as often as you can and text them. Tell them you love them and want to remain involved in their lives.
Follow up with their school activities and attend every single one you can. Showing up for the child will make it easier for them to transition into this new phase.
A divorce can affect kids more than we know. It helps to give them a sense of stability to support them through the entire process.